UC San Diego

During my very first quarter at UCSD, I wrote a goal that I wanted to “deepen my understanding of my role as it relates to ethics and power dynamics [and] seek to understand the balance between what I feel is ethical and what my position in any particular setting allows me to do about that feeling.” Over the course of my graduate studies, I have identified my values, honed my people-focused approach to leadership, and integrated the Ethics of Care and Service Leadership into my work. I have cultivated a decision-making framework that centers the well-being of collaborators because I believe this care correlates to their investment in the product. I first consider the personal code of ethics that I created, which outlines my eight top values and includes guideposts to measure if my behavior aligns with those values. Then, I ask myself some key questions to maintain accountability. Finally, I employ a series of ethical tests to further explore whether the decision intersects with the ethics-based practices I aspire to emulate. While working on my thesis show, Hedda Gabler, I explored using my positional authority to make difficult decisions with the ethical considerations outlined above. The show enabled me to practice ethical decision-making amidst a complex power dynamic. I employed these tools specifically while maintaining the artistic integrity of the production after opening night. Because of the trust I had built with my collaborators, the production ran smoothly with my ethical leadership during the performance phase. Embracing my authority was challenging for me before implementing this system. When previously working with people who had more formal authority than me, I avoided invoking any of the power I had due to fear of making a decision that could cause harm. I have learned to separate my feelings from what is actually in the best interest of a production and the people involved. This discernment between an emotional response and the facts of the situation helps me differentiate what is actually within my control from what I want to be within my control. Building on my original goal from the first quarter, I am now comfortable employing my decision-making frameworks to be an ethical leader and a more effective stage manager.